Hi, and welcome to one of my first real attempts at writing out a personal testimonial.  For over three years now I've been attending a church not too far from my home ... an experience that has changed the direction of my life (and my soul) in SO many positive ways, I can't possibly fit it all into one post, but I'll start from the beginning and a little at a time try and describe the major turning points as well as I am able.

Before I began attending this church and seeking after God, my life was an unmanagable mess.  I had no direction, no motivation, and no desire to in any way improve my conditions.  I was drinking and smoking pot on a daily basis, along with my so-called friends at the time who were all in either the same situation as me; or in some cases, much worse off.  I was lucky though, and I thank God daily that I hadn't ever gotten into trouble with the law, or done harder drugs or engaged in pre-marital sex as pretty much all of the rest of them had.  But I was still dancing in an abyss of daily darkness, seeking answers about God and enlightenment from all the wrong places.

"For sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, deceived me, and through the commandment put me to death."
Romans 7:10-12

I  had read many different books on witchcraft and the occult, as well as new-age and eastern religion only to continue to further confuse myself and invite dark spirits to take up residence in my body and mind.  Anyone seeing my artwork or poetry from highschool up until my fateful and grateful meeting with the former Senior Pastor at the church would and could testify that I was letting the enemy and his agents basically have free reign over my life and the decisions I made.

"He sacrificed his sons in the fire in the Valley of Ben Hinnom, practiced sorcery, divination and witchcraft, and consulted mediums and spiritists. He did much evil in the eyes of the LORD, provoking Him to anger."
2 Chronicles 33:5-7

Growing up with my father in the military, we moved around alot as most army families do.  And they say that the typical result of that kind of upbringing on a child will either turn him into a total extrovert, or a total introvert, of which I became the latter.  Trying to get close to or trust people soon because nearly impossible for me, and soon the only people I could manage to get close to were others who had the same issues and hangups that I did.  And although misery does love company, it also tends to feed off of it and multiply it exponentially in an environment where God is not involved.

I mostly kept to myself in school ... the only things I ever did other than go to school and then go straight home to watch television was to try out for (and write) school plays and create dark artwork; both were attempts to try and share my pain with others in the hope of some kind of sympathy or in an attempt to find others to befriend who were just as miserable as I.  I also now recognize these things I did (including the study of the occult) were all attempts to fill the void in my life that only God could fill.  

"Then Ananias went to the house and entered it. Placing his hands on Saul, he said, "Brother Saul, the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit."
Acts 9:17

But then, on a seemingly ordinary and depressing day some years ago, a friend of mine at the time who had been going to the church with his girlfriend, asked me if I wanted to go along with them.  The idea definitely didn't appeal to me at the time, (given all the darkness I had allowed into my life) but I decided it might be good for a laugh, and maybe to try and "freak out" some Christians.  Little did I know at the time that God had much bigger plans for me.

After the service, the (then) Senior Pastor called me over to a corner of the church and sat down with me.  I went reluctantly, trying to avoid eye contact and feeling something that I just couldn't describe... something that was challenging the evil that had set up shop in me.  He prayed with me, and had me recite a prayer or allegiance to Jesus Christ ... this was the very turning point at which i began to feel the stranglehold of Satan fading from me.

"But if I drive out demons by the Spirit of God, then the kingdom of God has come upon you."
Matthew 12:27-29

I spent the next few weeks after that in a wonderous, but confused state of mind... how could this be true?  How could a feeling of salvation and peace of mind come so strongly from having just said a single prayer?  But I continued to attend the church every sunday; more out of curiosity at first than anything else.

Other (less than pure) motives also kept me going back every week... I felt that I had fallen deeply in love with one of the girls there, and looked forward to seeing her every week more than I desired to hear the Word of God or to have relationship with Him.  Even when her parents (or most anyone else) would attempt to impart Godly wisdom, my focus and attention would be focused more on they're daughter than on what God was trying to tell me through them.    

"Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens."
Song of Songs 2:2

But after much praying and discussions with the youth Pastor at our church as well as with her parents, I began to understand that what I had been doing was not only impairing my progress in trying to get closer to God, but it bordered on idolatry.  This revelation struck me like a bag full of bricks!  God had done so many wonderful things in my life to bring me out of the darkness, and I had yet to seriously turn to Him in praise and thanksgiving for His many blessings and for the times He protected me from evil.  Even before I ever stepped foot in the church, He was there, looking out for me. 

So after coming to these tough realizations, I made a promise to God to focus on Him and His will for my life.  I prayed and repented of my impatience and desire to be married to her, and knew that if she and I are meant to be together, it would happen in His timing, and not in my own.   

"I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl."
Job 31:1

My attitude and approach have changed dramatically, as well as my priorities when it comes to putting God before anything or anyone else in my life.  He is the All in All, the Creator, and the greatest friend or father I could ever have.   

As you can probably guess, I've never had a girlfriend.  But in school it was because I had zero self confidence, and the few times any girl would show interest in me, I would subconsciously sabotage my chances in order to further feed the demons that were within me and feeding off of my pain. 

Since I've been going to church, I haven't had a girlfriend for the reasons that I'm waiting to be married instead of just "dating" and that I haven't been ready to be married.  And although I whole-heartedly believe that God has groomed me spiritually and mentally to be ready and delivered me from the things that were most strongly holding me back (drug and alcohol addiction as well as co-dependancy).

I still realize the need to be financially better off than I am before serious actions can be taken towards marriage and a family.  But God is continuing to daily do good works in my life as I am faithful to ask Him, and he has put a peace in my heart regarding such matters that I never could have imagined would be there only three or four years ago.  

And so, since first attending church, God has delivered me from drugs, alcohol, co-dependency, lust issues, procrastination, and powers of witchcraft and the occult; as well as any desire to ever go back to any of these things.  He has blessed me with patience and kindness, mercy and love, and with revelations of His Word, His Truth, and with the peace of the Holy Spirit.

• I began attending church sometime around March of 2004 (it may have been a few months earlier than this).

• On November 21, 2004 I was water baptised at the church in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

• And on December 17, 2006 I completed the Membership Track and became an official member of the Church. 
  

I thank God every day for the blessings He has bestowed upon me in His infinite wisdom and patience and love, and I now seek to share these wonderful gifts with anyone and everyone else who is willing to listen and receive from the Holy Spirit. 

My main goals in life now include:

1) to continue to learn and play the guitar (and hopefully to one day sing) for our monday night "Celebrate Recovery" meetings; where I have found tremendous amounts of camaraderie and support from others who have been in the same kinds of situations that I have.   I would also like to one day be able to play for the worship teams on wednesdays, thursdays, saturdays and sundays, but I've learned very well not to get ahead of myself, but instead to be where God wants me to be until I'm ready for such advancement.

"Four thousand are to be gatekeepers and four thousand are to praise the LORD with the musical instruments I have provided for that purpose."
1 Chronicles 23:5

2) to eventually become a Pastor and be able to be able to freely evangelize in public; and to be able to witness to those in desperate conditions, such as death-row inmates in order to try and help save as many souls as I can in much the same way my own soul was saved, all for the glory of God.

"But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved."
Ephesians 2:4-5

3) to become not just finacially stable, but to be well-off and be able to support a wife and a family.  I plan to find a good job (or go back to school to train for one) and also to continue to improve not just my musical skills, but also my art, poetry, web design, and whatever other creative outlets the God has blessed me with to be able to make money and help others discover and love the Lord; as well as to be able to tithe much more than the small pittance I have been able to scrape together in the past so that I may better serve God and bless His house.    

"Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver."
2 Corinthians 9:6-7

I realize that I am still a sinner (though one saved by grace) and that there are still issues in my life which need to be adjusted so that I may come into full alignment with God's plan for me and for those He wishes to reach through me, and I suppose writing this testimonial has (at the very least) given me some perspective on where I've been and where I now am.  I can relate all too well to the personage of Saul, who became the Apostle Paul in that he too was delivered from a life of Godlessness and darkness into the light of God's love and mercy.

"The priest of Zeus, whose temple was just outside the city, brought bulls and wreaths to the city gates because he and the crowd wanted to offer sacrifices to them.

But when the apostles Barnabas and Paul heard of this, they tore their clothes and rushed out into the crowd, shouting: "Men, why are you doing this? We too are only men, human like you. We are bringing you good news, telling you to turn from these worthless things to the living God, who made heaven and earth and sea and everything in them."
Acts 14: 13-15

This is to be just the first of hopefully many posts that testify to the glory and greatness of God, and His great works in my life, as well as the ones that I will be able to do in His strength in the lives of others. 

Thank you for your time in reading this, and any comments or suggestions are always more than welcome.

God bless :D